Watching a completely boring and disappointing Fame was not a complete waste. I watched people doing what they absolutely loved. They practiced, they practiced, they worked, they worked, they sweat, they sweat, they cried, and they cried... but they loved it. Their hobby became their job. And they loved it.
Here began my thought process: Hmm. I kind of wish I'd stuck with tap-dancing. Tap-dancing is so dorky that it's cool. It would be a great thing to pull out one people when they least expect it. I never practiced though. Too bad. Should've stuck with ballet too... then I wouldn't have to do Weight Watchers now, probably, because I'd be a lithe dancer... but I never practiced. Actually I think Mom has a picture of me pouting in my ballet outfit. Wow, there were a lot of things I never practiced... basketball, tennis, softball. Especially softball. I wouldn't practice at all and thought I was a terrible player... until the end of the season when I'd actually do alright-- only because I'd been forced to practice for three months. Piano-- I hated practicing piano. Probably why I can only play "Canon in D" and "Carol of the Bells." And the flute. I never made it past like, sixth chair out of ten floutists. I played for eight years, which is why I can still carry a tune, but I never practice.
I began to voice these thoughts, and my best friend's husband simply said, "You didn't love those things." He was a good teacher, but he didn't love it. He turned his life upside-down to start doing what he loves-- which meant two more years of school... but he's doing what he loves. His wife DID practice piano and became a superior pianist... because she loves it. And her hobby has somewhat become her job as she became a music teacher/worship leader/drama teacher.
Oh how my thoughts whirled. What do I love? What do I love to do so much that it never feels like practice or work?
So now what? That doesn't mean I don't love my job... but it made me think. It's not enough for me to turn my life upside-down just because I love something. My life is not my own-- it's the Lord's, and my desire is to serve him with my talents. I somehow need to find a way to meld my passions/what I love with the gifts he's given me and what he wants for me.
I'm not a risk-taker. But I'd love to put my foot through a door and have the Lord carry me across the threshold. I would love to put a God-given talent to work and love every minute of it.
And what do you love? What do you do? Do the two intersect?