May 22, 2011

So... Now What?...

So I'm engaged... now what?!  HTB (husband-to-be) left for a fancy shmancy international cruise the day after he proposed, and now I have been left reeling in the aftershocks of new engagement.

The day after was so fun: I got to bring a lot of joy to people just by flashing my ring (which is fabulous, is it not?  HTB did it all by himself, and did quite well, if I do say so myself.).  I feel that in one's life, there are really only two occasions on which you can bring such joy and even squealing-- engagement and pregnancy.  I played a game of hangman with my students until they guessed "Miss Hardt is engaged."  They were thrilled.  All of them wanted to know if they could come to the wedding, and a few wanted to be flower girls and/or ring bearers.  One student ran out the door and yelled down the hall, "She got bling!!!"

But with the excitement comes a bit of nervousness.  Not about HTB, because there is no one else I'd want to be with, ever.  But about the solemnity and reality of marriage.  It's for the rest of our lives, for better or for worse.  That's heavy!!

Seeing HTB's face on google talk after a day and a half of not seeing it calmed me down a bit (it always does), but I have found that I'm struggling with the same thing I struggled with at each new step of our relationship: trust.  It's the lesson God continues to teach me, and I don't know why I didn't expect it with this change.  With each change, I would freak out just a little, and forget that God's in control and had brought us together each step of the way.  And it's the same now, only even more exciting.  Once things got "normal," and "comfortable," I'd stop remembering I needed to trust.  So I've been reminded, and that's a good thing.

If you're looking for something to pray for us, please pray that we both trust the Lord and continue love Him more than each other, and that God would prepare us to enter into a lifelong, 1 Corinthians 13-type love affair.

Meanwhile, I'm ankle-deep in bridal magazines, sketches, planners, and ideas, and only just took a sigh of respite when my dear friends had a "pow-wow" with me, and HTB and I chose a date: January 12, 2012.  Why that date?  Because HTB is a little OCD (enough so it's endearing, not annoying) and he likes "1.12.12."  Seriously. :)

So now that I'm engaged, what do I do?  Pray for God to settle my crazy emotions and give me peace amidst my overwhelming feelings, pray that God would be shaping HTB and me into godly, mature, loving spouses, and get giddy now and then... because if there's ever a time to be giddy, it's now!

2 comments:

  1. eeeek - so excited!!!! love the date and the picture is too darling!

    p.s. are you on pinterest?! if not, i can send you an invite to it. talk about gathering wedding inspiration galour. warning: it is ADDICTING!

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  2. being praying for you both all along...and will continue to do so! so thrilled! :)

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